Life...

I know I have said this over and over again over the course of the past few years of my life. If you tire of hearing it, I apologize. But, it would seem to me God has thoughtfully and quite carefully allowed and appointed me to experience some of the darkest depths of life that have tragically become exceedingly common to most women.

I survived the same kind of troubled childhood that many women world-wide can relate to. I've been neglected, abused, rejected and flat scared to death. After experiencing an emotionally cancerous situation during adolescense and it nearly defiling my entire being, I know what it's like to be told that I was suffering from generalized anxiety disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, agoraphobia, panic disorder and depression. I understand what it's like to be under a doctor's care in order to 'treat' these things for several years. I know the devastation of brokenness. I know what it's like to have severe marital problems and to sink like the Titanic into the cold, dark depths of defeat and despair. I know what it's like to feel like a complete failure. And that's just the tip of this vast, engulfing iceberg.

I don't understand why, and I'm not sure that I'm meant to, but I feel with all my heart that God has called me to these experiences so that I might become better equipped to do His will toward those I will serve in ministry.

To this, I am greatly humbled, genuinely honored and it is my sincerest privilege.